Empty
by Crystallized.Dreams
Summary: Dean decides to end it all. Warnings: Two major character deaths. Do not like, do not read, also please read the authors note. Rated M for content.


**PLEASE READ!**

**This has been in my mind for a while and I've finally gotten effort to write it. I'm not 100 percent happy with this, but I want to know what others think. Also some of this was written in my point of view because I used to be really depressed and I think I still am, not to the point of killing myself, but it's still there, but it's getting better. And a few more things, if you don't like the fact that main characters of Supernatural die then I suggest you hit the back button. I don't want to look at reviews and see "I don't like it, my boys are dead! 0 stars" and other things like that. I want you to tell me if I need to improve anything like detail or grammar, something like that, not the fact that you hate this because "your boys" are dead. Warnings are in the summery. Also (sorry for the caps but this really needs to get itself across) IF YOU ARE DEPRESSED AND FEEL THE NEED TO END IT ALL PLEASE TELL SOMEONE! NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE SAYS OR DOES YOU ARE WORTH IT! PLEASE DO NOT HURT YOURSELF!!!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them **

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He doesn't know where it begins but he knows where it's going to end.

It's this black, desolate feeling that leaves you gasping for breath and for control. It aches and burns and leaves you to wither away to nothing. It's emptiness. Unforgiving, shows no mercy, no _fear_, it's all painted on smiles and endangerment to yourself because you really don't care about yourself anymore. All you are is nothing and everyone is waiting for you to fall, _you_ are waiting for you to fall, because that's all you're really good at.

Knives have lost their touch over time and alcohol doesn't numb it, it only intensifies it and you can't forget the feeling that isn't really a feeling.

You're hollow, dried out, nothing to everyone else and everything to no one else and it's slowly killing you, inside and out.

Scars that are not from hunts settle on your skin and no one notices because of your line of work and you wish to what-ever-the-hell-is-up-there that someone would notice your pain and sorrow and self-loathing because even though you are nothing, you still have a little bit of decency and pride not to tell anyone.

In truth, he's sick of it, all his life, never really having someone who would actually stay for awhile made him cold and lonely. One night stands never filled the void and actual lovers who are willing to stay the next morning don't either.

Right now his brother is gone, 'going out to get lunch' he said earlier, and he knows that this is his chance, the time to act, to let everyone know that he's hurting inside and to let everyone know that they were to blind, to wrapped up in their own pity to notice that he isn't alright. He never really was and probably never has been.

He grabs his gun from the table and holds it to his temple. He relishes the cool texture of it and goes to stand in front of a mirror in the bathroom because it only seems right to see the nothingness he's become, because he needs to remember why he's about to do this.

He hears the lock click and the door open. He then hears a yell from his baby brother consisting of, "Dean I'm back! They didn't have any pie so I got you some lemon bars and I hope that's okay because I-"

Sam stops short when he sees the bathroom door open and Dean with a gun to his head. Dean hears Sam ask, "What are you doing!?" But it's too late, he can't be saved because Dean thinks you can't be saved from yourself.

Dean turns his head and looks at Sammy and smiles bitterly, Sam hears Dean whisper "I'm sorry" and his big brother pulls the trigger falling to the floor with a hole in his head and blood splattered everywhere.

Sam is stock still from shock but reacts to the noise to the gun and runs over to his big brother, crying out his name, whispering, "No, no, no, no no, no," because it's all he can do now. Sam realizes he should have seen this coming, and then he realizes he didn't want to see it at all.

Sam knows what he's going to do. He sees the gun through his tears and grabs it, then with Dean's head in his lap, Sam also pulls the trigger, but before he does he whispers "I forgive you" and it's all over for them both.

Soon cop sirens wail in the streets and men in black clothing barge in the doorway, and what they see are two men, two brothers, with nothing to lose but everything to gain.

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** Please review! Also if you did not read the authors note, PLEASE DO SO!**


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